22 yr. old Chinese American male

Q: Were you born in the U.S.? If not, where were you born?

A: Yes

Q: What different cities, states, and/or countries have you lived in?

A: Hayward, CA and Martinez, CA

Q: Involvements in clubs or organizations (ethnic or non-ethnic apply):

A: No

Q: What gives purpose to your life?

A: Being able to be myself, figuring out what and how I need to do in order to better myself and not feel miserable and making sure I accomplish that, creativity, human interaction, knowing I can always have alone time whenever I feel like it.

Q: What relationships have been of major significance to you?

A: My family-mom, dad, and brother; my close friend whom I basically grew up with; and my first girlfriend.

Q: What is the racial and ethnic background of your closest friends? If they are of multiple ethnic backgrounds feel free to indicate their backgrounds.

A: One friend is English, Mexican, and Italian; another friend is Korean, Japanese, and German; and another friend is Mexican and El Salvadorian.

Q: When and how did you become aware of concepts of your race and/or ethnicity?

A: Hm…probably started because of my grandparents, who were also American-born. When we used to visit them in San Francisco when I was young and we’d always go out for lunch/dinner at Chinese restaurants, and when they would buy Chinese treats and pastries for my brother and I, that were basically ‘foreign’ to us, which made them really special. I think it kind of made me wonder and realize why these treats seemed so ‘rare’ and special to me, because you couldn’t get them around where I live and how most of the other kids from school probably didn’t have grandparents like I did to buy and introduce to them these amazing treats. My Grandma also gave my brother and I these little Chinese vests that she’d make us wear around the house when it was cold whenever she would visit and would always ask “have you been wearing your vest?” when she wasn’t there. We were very young, but I already knew that it was something I wouldn’t wear to school due to obvious fitting in reasons (I grew up in a mostly white suburban area, although there are a lot more non-whites in the area these days).

So, I think the answer to this question is when I subconsciously realized the cultural differences (including realizing you couldn’t get the food in the area I grew up in and not wanting to wear the vest to school). As in, my grandparents introduced me to all the Chinese cultural elements that they could, yet it would all not really ‘exist’ when I went to school and just basically living in the area I grew up in. It always came from my grandparents too, which accentuation the realization (as in: “Yay, we’re going to visit grandma and grandpa! Time for ‘weird’ Chinese stuff!”) , because my home life with my parents barely reflected anything having to do with Chinese culture. In fact, I remember being shocked to learn that taking off your shoes was a custom upon entering an Asian household from my friends who were Asian.

Q: What language do your parents speak at home? What is their predominant language on an everyday basis?
A: English, English

Q: What languages do you speak? What language do you speak most at home?

A: English, English.

Q: Have they ever expressed career expectations for you? What were those expectations?

A: No, not at all. My dad usually just expresses that I find something I enjoy and my mom doesn’t really even talk about that with me.

Q: Have you ever dated outside of your ethnicity?

A: Yes.

Q: If you answered yes, did your parents accept and respect your choice?

A: Yeah, totally.

Q: What is your educational status?

A: High school diploma.

Q: How do you define success in general?

A: Success is achieving your own individual goals that you set for yourself. It depends on the person to make the goals worth achieving and actually feeling like you’ve earned success, and most importantly, making sure you’re happy.

Q: Throughout your time in school, how often did you encounter people who assumed you were smart because you were Asian?

A: Never. I think people just knew me too well to actually seriously consider that, since I wasn’t really a bad student, but I wasn’t really a good one either and made no secret about it. However, I received about every OTHER Asian stereotype there is, ones that are much more offensive than the assumption of being smart.

Q: Have you visited the country or countries of your ethnic origin/s?

A: No. I would like to though.

Q: How knowledgeable are you about the history of the country or countries?

A: Very little.

Q: Do you feel a sense of belonging when you are in the company of people, a majority who are of your ethnic group? How strongly do you feel this on a scale of 1 to 5 (1 being not at all, 5 being very strongly)?

A: In a way, I do. I feel a sense of belonging in the sense that I identify with them being Chinese Americans. I feel like they’d not necessarily understand everything I am just by also being a Chinese American, but I can share something with them. I think there’s a ‘sense of relief’ in a way, to be around the same ethnicity, because you’re sure that they most likely will have a higher chance of understanding certain observations, concerns, and just everything else relating to you that regards being Chinese American, things that maybe are harder to talk about with non-Chinese Americans, or that they just wouldn’t understand. It just feels comfortable in a way, even if you don’t at all feel uncomfortable around non-Chinese Americans, if that makes sense. Growing up though, I didn’t meet very many Chinese Americans who shared similar interests and taste in things with me. So, based on my experience, whenever there were times where I hung out with people (where either all, or the majority, were Chinese Americans), as much as I felt the ‘sense of relief’ I described earlier, I also still couldn’t help but feel a little like an outcast because aside from being Chinese American, I didn’t share much else in common. I’ve been called the whole “white-washed” thing by some Asian Americans and as much as I thought that term was ridiculous, it also kind of made me feel that I didn’t really fit in anywhere (which of course is a big thing back then). I’m always happy to have things in common with people in general, but I think I’m always extra happy to meet, or even just to know about, other Chinese Americans who have similar interests as I do, because I think it definitely gives me a more complete and satisfying sense of belonging. So I guess on the 1 to 5 scale, I’d say about a 4.

Q: Do you feel a sense of belonging when you are in the company of people, a majority who are Asian? How strongly do you feel this on a scale of 1 to 5 (1 being not at all, 5 being very strongly)?

A: I think the answer to this is basically the same as the answer above, except less narrowed down and probably less of a sense of belonging, since it isn’t specific to my own ethnicity. I only chose to answer the above question with more detail because it’s more specific in relating to me. So, probably about a 3, I guess.

Q: Do you listen to music, watch movies, eat the food of your ethnic country or countries? How often do you do these things on a regular basis on a scale of 1 to 5 (1 being not at all, 5 being very often)?

A: Chinese music would be a weak 1, I would say, although I bet there are tons of Chinese music out there that I would love, but I just don’t know how and where to look for it. Then again, for Chinese music with vocals, I wouldn’t understand the lyrics. Chinese movies would probably be about 3 to 4. Chinese food would definitely be a 5.

Q: If you were born in America, did anyone ever assume you weren’t American because you are Asian?

A: Yeah. I remember a couple times in elementary school defending myself against statements such as “You’re not American, you’re Asian”. These days, for some reason, it seems like the only people who assume I’m not American are foreign people (who are usually older) who ask where I’m from and seem surprised when I tell them that I’m from America. Other than that, I don’t get that assumption about me often, although maybe it would be different if I didn’t live in a liberal area like the Bay Area.

Q: Do you believe that one’s emotional needs are less important than fulfilling one’s responsibilities?

A: I believe one’s emotional needs are actually way more important than fulfilling one’s responsibilities. I just feel like nothing else matters if you haven’t taken care of your emotional needs first.